The person “just came out swinging,” the manager said, “I was blindsided. It was not an inquiry, which would have involved asking questions it was a prosecution. The problems started in a routine meeting, when the employee began demanding to know why others had been promoted. One seasoned manager at a small tech company encountered a conflict entrepreneur for the first time a few years ago. “It doesn’t motivate change it escalates conflict.” Firing or otherwise parting ways with the employee could help - or make things even worse. “It will make things worse,” says Bill Eddy, a lawyer and mediator who specializes in dealing with high-conflict people. And soon, the problem metastasizes.Ĭalling a conflict entrepreneur out is equally unwise. They often tell very persuasive, emotional stories about how they’ve been wronged by a co-worker, convincing well-meaning colleagues to start doubting, avoiding, and undermining one another.
They have a way of recruiting others to their cause. Keep a safe distance from people who use all-or-nothing language or who delight in each new plot twist of a feud.īut what if you can’t distance yourself from a conflict entrepreneur? What if you must work with this person because you’re on a team with them, you manage them, or they’re your boss? In these cases, ignoring the person doesn’t work. One obvious response is to distance yourself from the conflict entrepreneurs in your office (or on your Facebook feed). Typically they do this not just once or twice, but again and again. Or maybe they spread rumors and suspicion about the company and its leaders via Slack or even social media. Think about someone you’ve worked with who sends defensive emails that may include ALL CAPS, copying multiple, uninvolved, often more senior colleagues in the cc line. They don’t exist in every organization, but, according to my research, they seem to be more common in certain workplaces, such as hospitals, universities, and political or advocacy organizations. Sometimes they do this for profit, but more often for attention or power. These are people who inflame conflict for their own ends.
One pattern, common to every instance I’ve seen, is the presence of conflict entrepreneurs. What causes high conflict? I spent four years investigating this question, following people who were stuck in all kinds of miserable feuds, personal and professional. This is what’s known as “ high conflict,” the kind that takes on a life of its own, and eventually, leaves almost everyone worse off. It hijacks precious time, trust, and energy, turning allies against each other and distorting reality. But sometimes, conflict can become malignant.
Most organizations need more good conflict, not less. Good conflict, the kind that is healthy, pushes us to be better as people and communities.